Dating relationship counseling the game when you are dating
“Increasingly I see couples who are entirely committed but not married,” she says.
“People who are ‘just dating’ rarely come to see a couples therapist.”When unmarried couples consult Ziff, she does not view them as any less serious than couples a generation or so earlier, who were quicker to marry and less likely to cohabit or date for long periods of time without marrying.
“I define a longterm relationship as one that survives the dopamine high,” he says.
“Where you get past that point where everything happens automatically.”In the case of unmarried couples in longterm relationships, therapy serves as it has done traditionally, as the tipping point for bringing ambivalent partners closer together.
In working with the longterm unmarried set, therapists or relationship coaches often say they see more similarities to married couples than differences.
Broder says he sees couples coming to therapy to reevaluate whether a stagnating relationship is one they should continue, after the initial passion, the lovestruck honeymoon period of the early months, has worn off.
Message boards abound with questions from those trying to navigate information about couples counseling.
In comments on an article about couples counseling posted on Très Sugar, a site devoted to women of Generation Y, a woman writes that she’s going in for a few counseling sessions with her boyfriend of three months.
See all of the in these slideshows With divorce so routine and pedestrian, and the longterm success of marriage precarious—and of such coin-toss odds—often relationship coaches may offer what parents cannot.“It’s a chi-chi, fun thing to do, to have a therapist,” she says.Anne Ziff describes her work as “divorce prevention.” As a marriage and family therapist, she has been in practice since the late 1980s, and works in Westport, Conn., and New York City.’ ”Caroline Dworin is a writer living in Manhattan.Her last piece for NEWSWEEK examined the phenomenon of pet psychics.
Instead, she views these unwed monogamists as a population hyperaware of the risks of tying the knot.